Relying on Strength Rather Than Empathy

I ran across a text photo on social media that said, along the lines, "I stopped talking to people about my problems and started praying because I realized I wanted strength instead of sympathy."

This action is one that I have fervently been practicing for the past year.

It wasn't until my previous relationship that I realized I couldn't rely on any person for my happiness or security. Yes, family and friends should support you and guide you when necessary, but sometimes, the problem within the relationship occurs because too many outside people are throwing out advice that isn't warranted.

The more I intentionally thought about who to contact when faced with large dilemmas or sudden frustration, the more my mind worked through the solution or emotions on its own. Whether these events involved friendships, family members, or colleagues, there were few instances where the counsel of a wise and impartial confidant aided the situation.

As a Christian, it's easy to forget that I can slip into prayer and speak to my Father at any given moment. Because I can't hear the words or feel His arms, I think I can find better comfort elsewhere. What happens is I'm still left troubled and now one more person is aware of my situation and emotions, for better or worse.

When we talk with others, we often find empathy, or, in the case of false friends, we stumble into hostile territory where we have now provided weaknesses. For me, when I confided in certain individuals last year, I found that while they didn't use the information to attack me, they did use it to fuel fire for their own purposes, fires that ended up burning large enough to burn me before they died down.

There's still anger in my heart for these actions. It's one of the last embers I can't put out. I learned a lot from this past year, and I largely learned about manipulation and what it looks like emotionally. I ruined my own happiness and security because I placed my strength in people instead of God and crumbled with the rest of them when their kingdom finally fell.

Relying on strength means relying on God. It means coming to Him in our times of need. Even if I only pray for guidance on who to turn to, when my mind comes up blank, that is God's way of telling me that this problem isn't large enough or complicated enough for me to involve another. My strength comes from knowing that God puts obstacles in my life at every turn: buying a home, ending a relationship, and overcoming disagreements in the workplace all play similar roles in building me into the person God intended.

My Lord, bring me to Your arms. Remind me of Your comfort and love amidst the confusion of the world. My final resting place is with You in Your Kingdom; therefore, help me to reside with You during my time here on earth. I pray for the healing of all people and the goodness of each to rise above their temptations. In Jesus' name, Amen.