When I first started reading and studying the Bible, I tried to pick verses that didn't mention God or Jesus Christ because I couldn't connect with those just yet. To this day, one of my favorite verses is Colossians 3:12-15. Yes, it mentions the Lord and Jesus, but as examples, as in, forgive because the Lord forgives and let the peace of Christ rule in your heart. It was easy to overlook those specific examples to take from it as a whole: love, forgiveness, compassion, kindness, humility, and gentleness.
I knew those ideas. What I needed at that time, as a new Christian, was how to relate it to my worldly life because it was the only life I knew of. I didn't want to forgive to help myself because it didn't feel like it did anything. However, knowing someone else had already forgiven me made it easier to forgive others.
One of the greatest sins is idolatry. As a convert, I tried to identify other ways to categorize these idols that would encourage me to rid myself of them before I truly understood them on a spiritual level. The first sin, and still my greatest, is anger.
How Anger Harms Us
Perhaps one of the greatest examples of sins that Jesus gave was in Matthew 5:21-22: "You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment."
If it helps, take away this faith-based example. How do you feel when you're angered? Your heart rate elevates, you may shake, you lose control of your tongue, your mind imagines the worst for them to bring yourself pleasure, and worst of all, you may harm the person who angered you with your internal words and actions to feel avenged.
The truth is, each time we let anger consume us to this degree, we lose control of our emotions in the future. We become prone to yell, to insult, and to push others away. We grow impatient and hard. We forget how to forgive.
We also face higher levels of stress, which leads to lack of sleep, poor nourishment, and seeking further idols to heal us: alcohol, smoking, screaming, shoving, or pills. Rarely do we stop ourselves in the middle of an anger tantrum, especially if it's mental, because we think that we're not hurting anyone so long as we keep our mouth shut. But that's not the truth.
In doing this, we're harming our well being and our emotional stability.
If it helps, take away this faith-based example. How do you feel when you're angered? Your heart rate elevates, you may shake, you lose control of your tongue, your mind imagines the worst for them to bring yourself pleasure, and worst of all, you may harm the person who angered you with your internal words and actions to feel avenged.
The truth is, each time we let anger consume us to this degree, we lose control of our emotions in the future. We become prone to yell, to insult, and to push others away. We grow impatient and hard. We forget how to forgive.
We also face higher levels of stress, which leads to lack of sleep, poor nourishment, and seeking further idols to heal us: alcohol, smoking, screaming, shoving, or pills. Rarely do we stop ourselves in the middle of an anger tantrum, especially if it's mental, because we think that we're not hurting anyone so long as we keep our mouth shut. But that's not the truth.
In doing this, we're harming our well being and our emotional stability.
Overcoming Anger
Anger, as I said before, is my greatest sin and temptation. Everything upsets me, and everyone upsets me. I feel as though I am always being stepped on, and that I am expected to remain silent and complacent because I'm "such a sweet girl" and "such a good girl."
Perhaps we should teach our daughters to be compassionate and steadfast instead of merely sweet, but that's a tangent.
If you cannot gain a foothold on your anger, you will never be control during any type of situation. People will begin to fear you, even the ones you are meant to protect. Fear is not respect. I am someone who often hides my anger and I blow it up when I am alone, which leads to stress and nervousness around any person I'm around, afraid that I will absorb their anger and have to suffer silently all over again.
I am sweet, but I am also tired of seeing myself and others be trampled on. I strive to be good, but I imagine others going through terrible trials as a punishment for how they treated me. This last one is a sin in Christ's eyes for our spiritual health, but it is also an attack on our mental, emotional, and physical health.
For me, I pray. Prayer doesn't have to be Hail Mary and Our Father. It can be having a conversation with yourself to God. Ask yourself questions in your head and answer them out loud. Imagine the Holy Spirit as a friend or family member you trust. Write down your thoughts. Scream into a pillow. Cry into your hands. Do what it takes to take that anger away.
I never understood forgiving until recently. I finally understood why I pray for peace for my enemies: I want them healed and at peace so that they may spread that to their loved ones. I pray for my enemies so that no one else may experience what I did. I pray for my enemies because I know that I have hurt people and never knew that I did. Worse, even when I knew I did, I never sought retribution from them.
We relinquish anger to free ourselves from the shackles of pain. If what we give out has a chance of permeating the rest of humanity, we should only send out peace, love, and compassion. Anger may always be an uphill struggle for me and others, but as long as we seek out peace when we feel it and overcome it rather than give in to it, we are still on God's path for us and improving the life on this world.
May the Lord free us from our sins, the ones we recognize and the ones we don't. May the Holy Spirit grace us with the strength to follow God's Will. May we remember Jesus Christ's outlook on internal sins as a way to strengthen our character. Amen.
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